Are they sandals? Are they boots? Are they even remotely comfortable or safe to walk in? More importantly, what do they mean?

I don't know. Maybe this is another variation of this summer's cut-out theme, like the gladiator sandals. People like those because of the cut-outs: they provide the illusion of an illicit peek. They can flatter the curves of thin legs, but when worn on heavier legs the effect is more like an overstuffed calzone, and that's not so nice. Anyway, I thought gladiator sandals were ugly, but these take the cake.

Is something wrong with Rachel Bilson's ankles that she needs to hide them with extra flaps of leather? Did she forget to shave? Or has she been talking to Mischa Barton again? Geez Louise, I hope not.